Bismillah! No!

In honour both of the climax of the English Premier League season and Danny Baker's return to BBC Radio Five Live after illness, here is a gem from the podcast Danny used to do with Danny Kelly.

Their friend Teletext Alex ingeniously replaced the lyrics to Bohemian Rhapsody with the names of professional footballers. Vocally he's no Freddie Mercury (or even Freddie "Parrot Face" Davies), but that's a small price to pay. Another version exists on YouTube from when this was later performed on Danny's Five Live show, however this is the original and best. A clever person on the internet added pictures of most of the players named.

A transcript of the lyrics is below, with the the new words shown after the relevant line from the Queen original.

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Things I Have Learned This Week

Picture taken by Chabata_k(Japan).) [GFDL (www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0
(www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/)], via Wikimedia Commons

1 The Queen's visit to Ireland was going really well until she had to sit through a performance by Westlife.
 
2. They're trying to pension off Ronald McDonald. Another shocking example of discrimination against people with red hair.
 
3. It's the end of the world today, for some of us at least. Just in case it's not - see you back here tomorrow to laugh at all those suckers who believed it *crosses fingers*.
 
4. A minor indiscretion was revealed, completely out of character...

5. Premiership footballers + Twitter = DISASTER (various).   

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